Life update

a few of you already know that life hasn´t been easy on me lately. 

my depression and anxiety issues have been rough on me. rougher than usual for some reason.

often when i get into these periods, i can still feel joy and excitement at times. this time it seems like i am on a deeper end of the depression pool. i try to make myself find the things i do feel joy about and makes me happy normally. but i am not quite there.

last saturday was scary and hard. scary because i couldn´t control the anxiety attack i had and the whole day was ruined. i felt small and frustrated and sad. 

i know i have to just struggle through. and i know that this is bound to happen from time to time with my type of issues, but it does not make it any easier.

 i have still enjoyed and nodded as i fully agree with the blog posts i have read this week that talked about the blogland being to perfect and not showing the real lifes that we lead. i really am not one that feels bad about my own life when i read about others that have a fantastic life, but i do appricate posts that really tell it like it is; we all forget things, events not working out as we planned, have messy houses, yelling and arguing. this is all part of life and is important to recognize to be able to work through the journey that life actually is. 

" Stop beating yourself up. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once."